Wednesday, June 7, 2006

Dear blog,

Hi, how are you? Sorry I haven't written in a while, life has been really busy and tiring. Really really tiring. In fact, I would much rather be asleep right now than writing this, but I missed you.

I started working this past Wednesday (a week ago today, awwww) and I've been struggling to keep my head above water since then. My boss has been going out of town for various reasons, leaving me to fend for myself and that's been the part that's wearing me out. So much to learn and I've got to learn it quickly and all on my own. Fun!

It's finally starting to get hot here in California. And by get hot I mean the other day I thought about wearing shorts and then realized this isn't really hot. Hot is 4274029% humidity and your shirt glued to your back by a layer of sweat that started to build the second you moved from your bed that morning, and you die if you wear long pants. We are not nearly that hot, although the way Californian's whine about the heat you would think we lived in hell and the devil was only providing hot cocoa to drink. And the devil's also making you wear a fuzzy wool scarf. That's how hot Californian's think it is. Big, whiney babies.

I had a run in with a toilet last night. I frequent this place that has bathrooms with heated toilet seats, frontal and rear cleaning features as well as a butt dryer. So last night I hit the frontal cleansing button just to see what it's about. Well, that was a mistake. The stream of water shot out with such force it scared me and I started laughing so hard I nearly fell off the toilet. I couldn't figure out how to stop the cleaning so I stood up and water continued to shoot out and got all over the bottom of my shirt. I couldn't get it to stop spraying so I had to sit back down. I finally figured out how to stop it but by then I couldn't stop laughing. Thankfully I was the only person in the bathroom because I'm sure I sounded like a nutjob, laughing at myself with water spraying everywhere. Lesson learned, never choose frontal cleansing again. If you are interested in installing your own personal bidet at home you can order one here. Seriously, try to contain your excitement.

Again blog, I'm sorry we haven't kept in touch. I'll try to be better about writing to you in the future but you have to promise to write back. This can't be a one way relationship, I can't give all the time. Sometimes I need to get some love and attention too.


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