Monday, September 18, 2006

The mysterious case of the meddled with lip gloss

I'm in the grasp of a crisis and I need Scooby Doo and the rest of his cronies to come help me solve the mystery of the lip gloss.

I keep two little pots of lip gloss on my desk at work since my lips tend to get rather parched in this dry California climate. One is your standard Smith's Rosebud Salve and the other is also a Smith's but it's Strawberry scented and wonderful and, as proved over the weekend, impossible to resist.

When I came in this morning I grabbed my strawberry lip gloss and was about to apply it when, egads!, I noticed someone had used it. I was so immediately grossed out that I couldn't even function enough to put the little pot down. I just sat there, very confused, wondering what kind of sick person uses a stranger's lip gloss. And I'm sure it wasn't my boss or coworker that used it, so that leaves the cleaning crew. Let's summarized shall we? A complete stranger stuck their finger in my irresistible strawberry lip gloss and swiped it across their mouth. And they possibly stuck their finger back in for another go. The worst part of this whole situation is that I just bought that lip gloss and had only used it, maybe, three times.

I bet you're wondering how I know someone used my lip gloss. Well, I guess this is when I finally reveal to the world that I'm a little weird about certain things. Some people have noticed that I take the second thing from the shelf when shopping. I'm not big on buying the only shirt in my size from a store; if possible I want a fresh one. Display shoes? Yesterday I bought a pair of shoes that were on display and it took quite a bit out of me. And when I got home I noticed the toe was scuffed just a teeny tiny bit and I said to myself "You shouldn't have bought the display pair, others have tried them on." And display makeup? Well, I have too many rules to even get into here.

The thing with my lip gloss pots is I only use one small area of the gloss. I like to leave the rest smooth and shiny and new looking. See here:
I only use that one little scooped area. And the rest is all shiny and new.

And here is the strawberry lip gloss as I found it this morning
Look at the disregard for my scooping system. The whole pot was shiny and new before they used it, did they think they wouldn't be caught?

And just because, here is the evidence side-by-side
Oh, the horrors! And please note that the darker lip gloss also has a second little splotch in it. I didn't do that, so basically this person used both of my lip glosses.

I know I may seem like a nut job, but lip gloss stealing is a gateway crime, it leads to harder ones like baby seal clubbing and crack dealing. This person needs to be stopped for their own good. Scooby Doo, where are you?


  1. Gross. Maybe you should sprinkle a little cayenne pepper on the top. If the offender tries again they'll be in for a surprise.

  2. okay this posting not only grossed me out but so much so that I had to register to your blog jus so I can post how much I worry about leaving my things around the office now... hmm... it's just as bad as the case of the missing raffle tickets...

  3. I'm with you on this one Regan. I think you should hang a sign up that reads, "NO, you may NOT use my lip gloss", and then watch to see who reacts to the sign. The evil doer will reveal themselves and you can give them a dirty look.

  4. I like my mom's idea of cayenne peppering the tops of the lip glosses. The only thing is I MUST remember to not use them once sprinkled.

  5. Maybe you need a lock box for your lipgloss. A clear one so the culprit can see the glossy stuff but not actually get to it. Then you can put a hidden camera so you can find out who's ogoling your gloss (I'm actually not really kidding, I think it's totally gross that someone would use your gloss and I'm w/ you on that one b/c I totally notice when even a pen is moved on my desk.)