Wednesday, November 14, 2007


Have you ever wanted something so totally stupid that you just couldn't bring yourself to actually buy it? Like if you shelled out money for it you would automatically be branded an idiot and all the world would mock you? That's how I feel about this avocado slicer. I have no idea why I need it, but I do. Yes, I could slice an avocado with a knife but why would I when such a fine tool is made specifically for the job?

The real desire for this kitchen tool came about when Ms. Martha Stewart added it to her Macy's line of products. Before she had it, the avocado slicer was just another gimmicky "As Seen On Tv" item and I could rational not buying it. "It's got it's own infomercial, and nothing on an infomercial is good." But damn that Martha, she has it in her line and now I neeeed it.

I was at Macy's today buying some Thanksgiving supplies and I saw the avocado slicer. I picked it up, walked around with it for a few minutes, and then put it back. As I put it back I thought "I can't buy this, Alton Brown would be so disappointed. It's a uni-tasker." At some point in time I'll decide that wanting perfectly sliced avocados is more important to me than Alton's approval.

Some day dear avocado slicer, some day you will be mine. Until then, I'll see you in my dreams.


  1. hee hee, when I was reading it I was going to remind you about Alton's views on uni taskers. But I see you did it for me!

  2. Cutting or peeling avocados is pretty easy with a knife and spoon, so I'm with Alton on this one. Although, jparks has his crepe spatula and plus the avoca-doh slicer does have the gimmick factor which I'm a sucker for in a huge way. Hell, if you have the space for it go for it.

  3. I have a knife that is exclusively meant to cut grapefruit. And I totally want to buy one of those zester knives, that is ONLY used to add like an 1/8 teaspoon of zest to one out of every fifty recipes.

    I totally feel ya.

  4. Uni-tasking bad. All my avocados gently surrender to the loving caress of my chef's knife.

  5. see, the beauty of the avocado slicer is that you can slice that entire half of your avocado AT ONE TIME! And, you don't have to use a sharp paring knife to cut it, which lessens your chance of slicing your fingers open, thus allowing you to cut your avocado in the morning when you are half asleep if you so desire. And it looks pretty cool. I say get it and eat lots of avocados!

  6. Maybe you can just get a very nice knife. We're slowly phasing out our crap knives and replacing them with high quality ones. I tell ya, when I wield my perfectly balanced Santoku, no meat or vegetable is safe. Put on a Kurosawa movie and it's on!