Tuesday, December 4, 2007

changing citizenship

For years and years and years now I have dyed my hair. I experimented with various shades of red until I found the perfect one (that is, of course, after I ungothed myself and stopped dying it black). That specific red stuck until I started to notice my hair thinning and I could only assume that after 14 years of constant torture it was going on strike. We went back and forth with negotiations and finally an acceptable offer was reached. I would stop dying my hair until I reached an age when I couldn't handle the grays anymore and then I could start dying it again.

It has taken a while for me to cut all of the red out of my hair but with my last stylist appointment we have finally reached it's natural color. Which is most certainly not red. Obviously I knew my hair color wasn't red but, after so many years of pretending, I had convinced myself that it had to be slightly red. A reddish brown. Yeah, that's the ticket. But now I'm having to face the cold hard truth, my hair is not reddish brown, it is brownish brown.

The fact that my hair is not really the color I was dying it has thrown me into a mini identity crisis. Before, with the red hair, everyone assumed I was Irish. Pale + green eyes + red hair= Irish. This was great when jparks and I went to Europe because, until I opened my mouth and the dumb America accent tumbled out, most people thought we were from Ireland and were nice to us. Hey, we aren't Americans who are going to be loud and obnoxious, we're Irish!

But now, well, I look not so Irish. In fact, on Friday night, I was told I look Russian. There's nothing wrong with looking Russian, I'm just not used that. I guess now I can walk around and say "In Soviet Russia kitteh captions you!"

The other crappy thing I've learned about my hair is that I have a fair amount of gray. Luckily it's scattered and my stylist was able to literally nip it in the bud, she cut it all out at the scalp. She said we won't be able to do this for long as eventually it'll lead to bald spots, but we're okay right now. Also, does anyone know why the gray grows faster than the rest of my hair?

I've been pretty mopey since learning I'm no where close to being a redhead. Jparks says he likes my natural color, but I think he's finally learned that a husband is never supposed to say he doesn't like something about the wife. Of course he loves my brown hair, he wants to have sex again in the future.


  1. Wait, Americans are known for being louder than Irish? I'm scratching Ireland off places to visit. I was hoping I could be myself and not stand out there. Ha.

  2. look into Herbiceutical's Naturcolor... they have some really pretty shades, cover gray, and don't stress your hair... ask lauren where to get it out there

  3. I guess we always want what we don't have, eh? I wanted to be a brunette for the longest time. When I was in Korea I would often get mistaken for a Russian girl instead of a Canadian or American. Often it was when I was trying to buy something and the store owner was refusing me, until I stopped speaking Korean and told them in English that I was Canadian. I got so much free stuff! (unfortunatly there are a lot of Russian prostitutes in Korea, especially Seoul)

  4. I had a bloke in a phone shop in Bath think I was Canadian, based on my accent. Now, I know there are parts of Canada where I could pass, culturally, but I didn't think my gravelly cracker drawl suggested Great White North...

  5. Jon, since moving to California I have been asked if I'm Canadian about 10 times based on my accent. It's very bizarre and I don't understand at all why people think that.

  6. Regan I promise you 100% that your accent is not Canadian. Although we would be happy to have you. I think it's just people here are from everywhere and have no clue. I am also of the opinion that the Canadian accent is elusive. Unless it's a really drawn out Northern Ontario accent of a really brougy NFLD one, I can't even tell, and I'm Canadian!