Friday, March 14, 2008

The love list. Hate monger edition.

All sorts of people have been doing the latest blog craze, a love list. And while there are many things out there that I love (I'd like to give a shout out to Reese Peanut Butter Eggs!) my head hurts today so I'm going to take this in another direction and create a hate list. Just call me Henry Rollins. (He's still angry, right?)

  • I hate when my lean cuisine looks really tasty in the picture on the box but then microwaves into a pile of chewy noodles with lumps of stuff that resembles veggies, but surely can't be.

  • I hate opening my gmail account and not having new emails

  • I hate when jparks gets the mail. This means I can't get check the mail box and checking the mail box is like discovering a treasure every day.

  • I hate fingernails on a chalkboard. Just thinking about it is making my skin crawl.

  • I hate when coffee sits on my desk and gets cold, but I don't realize it's cold and take a sip. I call this fuzzy coffee and it makes me want to throw up.

  • I hate reggae music with a burning passion. SHUT UP BOB MARLEY. JUST SHUT THE HELL UP.

  • I hate when people have "In Memory of Aunt Sue 1947-2008" printed onto the back window of their car. Seriously, that's the best tribute you could come up with for Aunt Sue? A sticker on the back of your car? I hope you didn't get anything left for you in her will.

  • I hate earthquakes.

  • I hate when Lily gets all snuggled up next to me and then surprise humps my arm.

  • I hate when Taco Bell puts onions in my bean burrito. Hello, Taco Bell, bean burritos aren't supposed to have onions on them! Get it right!

  • I hate that the decision to have kids has to be an active decision for jparks and I.

  • I hate vacation planning.

  • I hate that I have a ton of crap in my huge purse.

  • But I hate the idea of a smaller purse even more

  • I hate hippie yoga instructors that want you to be all hippie with them. Leave my aura alone, jackass.

  • I hate Nicholas Cage. No, I haven't seen him in whatever movie made you like him. No, I won't see it even on your suggestion. Sorry, that's just how my hate rolls.

  • This list could keep going on and on but I'm starting to look like a really angry, mean person and I swear I'm not. Unless you're jparks and have to deal with me first thing in the morning before coffee. At that time all bets are off and the she-beast in me comes out. In fact, I bet if jparks made a hate list, dealing with me in the mornings would be right at the top of it. Ah, good times.


    1. Lily's a girl, and yet she humps? Hmmm....
      The reason yoga kinda freaks me out is the hippie-ness of it. I want to get my sweat on and get outta there, I don't need to lie on a mat for 10 minutes after to centre myself or some other such crap.
      Hmmm that felt good!

    2. I did a hate list too. First of course. Hate is more my thang.

    3. Nope. You are lovely and wonderful any time of the day. *Especially* when you haven't had your coffee;-)

      Lily told me she calls it "stealth humping".

    4. slynnro, back off the hate. It's mine, all mine!

      deadra, I once had a yoga instructor tell me to grind my anus back into the ground it came from. AND she said it with a straight face. How can you say that and actually mean it? I nearly died.

    5. I'm pretty down with doing a hate post too. I liked this!

    6. Sorry, but now I have a mental image of a giant anus-grinding pepper mill. Or would that be "anus mill"?