Wednesday, July 2, 2008

I'm going to join AARP tomorrow

One night I walked into my mom's bedroom and woke her up to show her three sores that had just popped up on my stomach. She took one look and said "Those are chicken pox. Go to bed because tomorrow you're going to be miserable." Sure enough the next day I woke up and the sores had spread to the rest of my stomach and chest. Later that day I was almost completely covered. I was 18 at the time and this was 2 days before my high school graduation. Good times!

Today I called my dermatologist that I saw on Monday to let him know that the medicine he had given me was not working and that the pain was becoming unbearable. He asked if I had ever had chicken pox and I said yes. He said "Well, I think it's safe to say that you have shingles." Motherfucking shingles! The doc said he thought it looked like shingles on Monday, but since he had never seen it on someone so young before he thought for sure he was wrong. In case you're not familiar with shingles it is most common in folks over the age of 55.

The moral of these two incidents? I apparently get diseases at ages when most people are not prone to them. I am a freak of nature and you all shouldn't be surprised when next week I start to complain about how my knees ache when it's about to rain and I mention that I might want to move to Miami and live in a retirement community.

And the real kicker is that the nurse from my doctor's office called me to say that the doctor wants me to stop shaving for a month now because that's how long it could take for this to clear up. And when I asked why they thought I had gotten this, she suggested that possibly all of the running caused my immune system to weaken and caused the virus to flair up. Oh, and I should stay away from deodorants with chemicals in them because it could BURN MY SKIN. I hope for the sake of jparks and others that have to smell me that Tom's Hippie deodorant works.

So, to review, I have an old person's disease, have hairy pits that are getting more hairy by the moment, and will be one smelly girl for the next month. If you were thinking I might be cool to hang out with at BlogHer you might want to give that a second thought. I'll just ease the pain of losing the chance to meet people and the pain of my shingles with the Tylenol 3 the doctor prescribed me (yum, codeine!).


  1. For what it's worth, I had to give up deodorants with chemicals about two years ago, because I had perpetual irritation. The Tom's stuff works, but their scents are pretty messed up. At best, you can get the "Unscented," which smells like Froot Loops.

    HOWEVER, I've done some experimenting at Whole Foods and found one by EarthScience that does work well. I use the Liken Plant scent, which is nice and normal. I can't claim that it's Secret Clinical Strength, but it gets the job done. (Dan seems not to complain, for instance.)

  2. ugh. duuuude. one of my friend just had shingles. She's like 60 though. Wtf, you freak? Tom's works. I mean. I sweat a helluva lot AND I happen to have super hairy armpits. Like.....crazy hairy. I could braid it. Grossing you out yet? You'll see in a couple of weeks.

    So, I won't mind hanging out with you and your smelly, hairy pits at BlogHer. We can get drunk and swing from chandeliers and take pride in our pits. Um. Do they have chandeliers at the Westin? I'm sure we can find one.

  3. tom's works to an extent. my brother Adam gets shingles. Unfortunately once you get them you are prone to getting them. It is usually related to being over stressed and putting your immune systemnout of wack. But they do have a shingles vaccine now which you really should look in to getting b/c you don't want to keep getting them. It isn't about age so much but just that old people are mor likely to get diagnosed instead of waiting for it to go away. Feel Better! And spoil yourself some!

  4. POWER TO THE OLD PEOPLE DISEASES!!!! haha. We should start a club! I get to be President mom will be so proud!

  5. In an attempt to make you feel better, my university roommate had shingles - while we were in university making her about 21 or so at the time. If you're a freak, then she's freakier!

    And I as I recall, she was completely miserable. You have my sympathies. Take care!

  6. Yikes. So sorry to hear that. I'm surprised that the doc thought all the running would wear down your immune system. I thought being physically fit meant you had a stronger immune system. Adam used Tom's and he doesn't smell (unless he's spent the day lugging his laptop bag back and forth across the G campus on a hot day in which case he does smell when he gets home.) I would not recommend Jason's deodorant. I didn't think it worked very well.

  7. I have tried all kinds of deodorants over the years, and I have to agree that Earthscience's Liken Plant worked the best for me. I still use it, and I find it holds up pretty well, even when I'm swimming in NOLA summer soup (aka 100% humidity).

  8. Oooh, sorry to hear about the shingles!! Don't feel bad though... my 32 year old boyfriend had them TWICE this last year. His doctor said that if he has one more bought of shingles, they're going to have him get the shingles vaccination they give to old people. Rest up and I hope you feel better soon!