Tuesday, August 26, 2008

no love for August

At the beginning of this month I was going to write a post about how much I hate August, but I never could come up with the reason for the hate. Sure August is hot, there's not a holiday in it, and it's back to school time (which means Girl Scouts is starting up soon), but those aren't reasons to really hate the month the way I do. I've spent the past 26 days trying to put my finger on where my hatred for it comes from and all I've got is that August sucks.

I could take the easy route and say that Hurricane Katrina happened in August and yeah, that did suck and so damn you August! But I'm not convinced it's that. The hurricane hit so late in the month that my life didn't really turn to shit until September. And I have no ill feeling about September. If anything, I like September more because it means August is gone. Goodbye August, don't let September hit you in the ass on the way out!

Last August jparks and I moved into our house, and I feel like I should be able to look back on it and remember August of 07 fondly. We bought a house! It's the ultimate adult purchase! It's the foundation I needed to start building my family! And yet, it doesn't make me like August any more than I did previously. In fact, when I look back on August of last year all I can remember is getting really frustrated with various painters and puking while movers slowly packed my apartment into a van. I bet none of that would have happened if I had moved in October. (which is my favorite month. Yay October! I love you like a fat kid I love cake)

The moral of the story is that August just sucks. It sucks for no good reason, other than the fact that some month has to be my least favorite and August won that title. I guess I better starting planning now to not get pregnant in December because dammit, I will not have an August baby. That child would be a cross between Damien, Rosemary's Baby, and The Problem Child and, seeing as how it's going to have some of jparks DNA, my child will not need any extra help being a handful.


  1. I have always, always, always hated the month of August. This year's is proving to be no exception. Come on, September!

  2. august is canada is kind of great. we get a made-up holiday for absolutely no reason on the first monday of the month. i LOVE made-up holidays!

  3. How can August possibly suck when that is the month my precious baby girl was born??? AND it's the month right before my September birthday, so it's good in my book. One way to make August a better month is to take a vacation in August, then August is great because it means VACATION! And who doesn't love vacation? Especially vacation in Hawaii.

    Now February sucks. It's cold, rainy, and just an excuse for Old Man Winter to keep throwing crappy weather at us. The only way February would be redeemable is if I spent the whole month in Hawaii, where even when it rains, the weather still doesn't suck because you get rainbows!

  4. I think August's problem is no holidays. And if you go on vacation during August, everything is crowded because that's when everyone else goes on vacation. Which is why I like the idea of year-round school: same number of school days, but spread out more, so you don't have big long blocks of vacation, but not big uninterrupted blocks of school, either.

    I like July, because there are no stupid sports distracting from baseball (and there's even the Tour if you're into that). And September is birthday time, plus pennant races, then playoffs in October!

  5. I hate August too. Mainly because in Chicago it is when it is the hottest and the most humid and just all around yucky. But then the end of the month always cheers me up because YAY! COLLEGE FOOTBALL!