Tuesday, December 9, 2008

tardy to the party

I know in the past I've said I'll watch any show Bravo airs, but that was a lie. What I meant to say was I'll watch any reality competition or spin off from a reality competition that Bravo airs. Of course I watch the popular competitions, like Project Runway and Top Chef, but I'm also a total sucker for Top Design and Shear Genius. And I'm not above admitting to watching the whole series of Make Me A Supermodel. Honestly, sometimes the less brain activity a show requires on my part, the better.

On Saturday afternoon I was searching for something mindless to watch so I could relax and maybe take a nap, but I discovered that I had nothing on tivo worthy of half-conscious viewing. I clicked through over to Bravo hoping that there would be a Top Chef marathon but instead found a Housewives of Atlanta marathon. And people, that was television gold.

I caught the last episode of the season and the reunion episode, where one housewife had to sit on another so she wouldn't beat the ass of a third housewife. It was awesome. After the reunion episode, the Real Housewives of Orange County came on and it was good too. I have no idea why I resisted the Real Housewives for so long, but I'm making up for lost time by picking up season passes to both of them.

Jparks tried to watch a bit of the shows with me and made it through about twenty minutes before he just couldn't stand it anymore. He really tried his best, but he couldn't get over the fact that I was willing to watch a show where a fight that happened in an earlier episode was still heavily talked about and yet, no one mentions what the fight is about. "Why do they all hate each other?" "I don't know." 4 minutes later "Why do they all hate each other?" "You have seen exactly as much as me, so how could I possibly know if you don't." Not long after that he left the room muttering under his breath about how stupid the show is. He is obviously of a mindset that all television viewing needs to be high quality, like his favorite show Stargate Atlantis.

So, is anyone else watching the Real Housewives? Why do Nene and Kim hate each other? And who is Kim's Big Poppa? And why does Kim insist that she's 29? And as for the Housewives of the OC, OMG I just love them all. I think I need to see if the past three seasons are available on dvd because I need to start at the beginning. Maybe get to the bottom of why Don doesn't fill Vicki's love tank anymore. Or find out why Jeana is allowing her ex-husband to live in her house. I have so many unanswered questions!


  1. I don't know why I'm so excited to have my vast expertise on such things called out, but here I am. Excited to help.

    The NeNe/Kim squabble has to do with an original beef between NeNe and Sheree and Kim changing allegiances and talking smack. What we saw on air was only a snippet, and the whole thing was shrouded in bitchy snaps and catty sidelong glances.

    Big Poppa is a married man (allegedly getting a divorce). Real estate developer. White. Named Lee Najjar. There was speculation it was Quincy Jones, since Kim had a connection to Dallas Austin for her "singing" career. [note: irony quotes]

    No way, no how she is only 29.

    Vicki is horrible, controlling, and crazeeeee. She comes from modest Midwest stock and is trying desperately to make more, more, more money so someone back home will be proud.

    Jeana has terrible self-esteem - still longs for the 80s when she was skinny and in Playboy. [note: patrick nagel "artwork" and glamour shots of herself next to bed] She is a beautiful woman who doesn't give herself enough credit.

    Previous seasons - while delightful viewing - aren't crucial. They also contain cast members who are no longer on the show. That will bring up more questions. And then you'll start googling them. It's all down hill from there. You don't even want to know what I've read about Gretchen (the new girl from the OC version)!

  2. Confession: I've never actually seen an episode of Real Housewives (I KNOW...right?), however, in NYC, the "stars" were at pretty much every red carpet event I ever covered (yawn). And now(!), as I'm sure you know, they are filming one in SF (to air after Atlanta, methinks), and one of the "stars" is one of my clients! And she epitomizes the stereotype, let me tell you.

    So believe you me, when that shit does air, I will be hosting regular viewing parties ;-)

  3. Stara and Kristin and I LOVE this program.

    And, Kim is actually really 29. SHOCKING, I KNOW.

  4. Hey, no dissing the Atlantis. It's an excellent show... even if this is the last season.

  5. Go to TVGasm.com and read the recaps. They are funnier than the episodes.

  6. I'll admit it, I love the Houswives! OC is my favorite, but that could just be because I used to live in Orange County. I didn't like the NY one at all, but the Atlanta one was golden!

    I agree with Alyce, Vicky is crazy. But entertaining. That whole "filling up my love tank" think cracks me up. Jeana makes me sad, it seems like her hubby was a prick who left her with no self esteem. Her whole self worth is tied up in her weight.
    Lauri-the really rich one-has a son that's a heroin addict, but a perfect seeming life otherwise. She seems sweet but also a bit dumb.
    And now I'm dying to know the scoop on Gretchen!

  7. I too never watched a Real Housewives series until Atlanta. And I was SO GLAD I DID! That was quality television right there!

    NeNe made a hilarious song about Kim and that's why Kim doesn't like NeNe. But Kim is the only person in the world that hates NeNe. I LOVE NENE!

    They better be bringing that shit back for another season.