Remember when I mentioned that Molly has ruined the carpet in our guest room and, in order to safely turn it in a nursery, I would have to replace it? I would like to go back to that time please. That time when I didn't know just how hella expensive carpet is. And when I could look at Molly without wanting to force her into kitty pageants to pay off her many vet bills and home improvement expenses. (Do you think that cat pageants would be as awesome as dog pageants are in Best In Show? Because if so, I'm packing up a busy bee and entering one immediately.)
I've gotten two bids on replacing the carpet in that one 10'x16' room and the first bid is right below $1000 and the second is just above $1100. I could call more companies, but I am confident that the lower bid will be the lowest I'm going to get. When the contractor called me with the bid info he even told me "I buy a lot of carpet and I've got to be honest, that's some expensive carpet." Great. Thanks Molly for literally pissing away $1000. Perhaps if I use loose change in your litter box instead of cat litter you'll start going in there? Would that be more acceptable for your bathroom needs? You do realize that I have to pay for cat litter, so even by peeing on that you are costing me money. Why can't that be enough for you?
I feel like this experience has been a good lesson preparing me for parenthood. Why buy the expensive stroller when your kid will just pee and puke on it? Why get the more expensive, but just as safe as the cheap model, car seat when you'll just end up picking cheerios and god knows what else out of it for the next three years? The only thing I think I can justify spending a ton of money one is a breast pump and that's because it's for me and I take care of my things. I have never once peed on the floor in my bedroom. And while you will occasionally find a stray french fry in my car, I assure you it didn't come from me. Drive through employees drop them in while handing me my bag of food just to make me look bad. It's a conspiracy, X-Files even did an episode about it once.