Before I got pregnant I like to think that I was a pretty active person. I mean I hated the gym with the best of them, but I still made myself go. (Mostly thanks to the personal trainer that cost me a butt load of money. Nothing guilts you into working out like paying a stupid amount to get your ass handed to you on a bench press) However, since getting pregnant I've become one of the laziest people to sloth their way across the earth.
I know that one of the keys to a healthy pregnancy is exercise but I prefer to pretend I have never heard that bit of advice. And honestly it kills me to be this lazy, but I'm one of those "If I can't do what I want, then I'm not doing anything at all" types of people, and right now I can't run so I'm doing nothing. How sick is it that I want to go for a run so badly that I actually dream I'm training for various races. Who does that? Shouldn't I be dreaming of booze and sushi and other crap that's off limits? No, not me, in my dreams I lace up my trainers and head out for a 10 mile run. I dream of clipping my iPod on and hearing the songs that make me mouth the words like an idiot while I run through my neighborhood.
While I'm not allowed to run I am allowed, encouraged even, to walk. But really, walking? Lame. My grandmother walks. My tiny chihuahua walks. Weird speedwalkers walk. I walk from the car to the mall but I do not walk as exercise. It's not that I don't recognize it as exercise, it's just that I feel so weird walking. When I'm walking through the neighborhood I feel like I should have a little sign that says "I'm not casing your house, I'm walking. FOR EXERCISE." When I go running I'm all decked out in running clothes, and somehow that makes it feel like real exercise, but when I walk I'm in my regular clothes. Working out gets you sweaty, sweating requires special clothes, walking requires no special clothes, therefore walking is not working out. See Regan justify. Justify, Regan, justify.
So since running is out and walking is not my thing, I think I might take up swimming. Because there is nothing sexier than a preggo in a tankini. Our neighborhood has a heated pool and I don't think many people use it in the mornings, so my plan is to buy a kick board and swim modified laps. Modified because I'm going to basically float while kicking. But that's exercise! Why? Because I need special clothing to do it and equipment. See previous paragraph.
Now, someone ask me in a week if I've gone swimming even once. Because I'm fairly certain the answer will be "No, but I went for a damn walk."