Last Thursday jparks picked up and built the latest addition to the nursery, the crib. And then on Friday I went to an OB appointment and was told that I've reached the point in the pregnancy where I have to go in for check ups every two weeks. Because apparently we are having a baby soon. Both of those events sent my mind reeling because a baby needs things and I don't have things! Also, what do I know about babies? I'm afraid to even hold a newborn because they are breakable. Ask our friends that have kids, I won't touch the baby for a couple of weeks because I didn't want to be the person that is responsible for giving the kid a soft spot noogie on accident. And yet it appears I'm going to be bringing one home in about eight weeks.
This realization led to me scouring Baby Bargains for product reviews and then heading over to my registries to add and delete items obsessively. After searching for my Babies R Us registry I noticed this:
Whoa, jparks gets around! He's a man whore with babies all over the country!
And then on Amazon he has a few more baby mommas:
I feel so cheap and used. And a bit scared because here I thought I was just unleashing one mini-jparks onto the world, but I was so wrong. There will be many and, my god, the world is not ready for that.