Wednesday, October 28, 2009

I have many more gym complaints, but I'll spare you

Can we talk about a few things that have been pissing me lately? Perhaps it's because I've been sleeping less but it seems like way more little things drive me out of my damn mind and I just can't take it anymore. And seriously, it's all little things that should not bother me. What can I say, parenthood has made me a cranky bitch. Now I understand what happened to my mom. (kidding, mom. Please don't cut me out of your will, I really want your jewelry.)

A radio station here has started playing what they call "Vintage Vinyl" but I call "Songs From When I Was In High School And Are Not Vintage By Any Means, Dammit I Am Not Old." When I hear the term "Vintage Vinyl" I expect songs that were actually released on vinyl, not songs that came out in the age of cds, which are not made of vinyl. I guess "Plastic from the Past" doesn't have the same catchy ring to it that "Vintage Vinyl" has. Also, that song from Kids is not vintage music! Neither is Closing Time by Semisonic! Don't make me send you a list of acceptable vintage songs Live 105, because I will. I have no life and have time to care about this sort of crap.

I've recently joined a new gym and many people there wear these abominations:class =

I honestly can't come up with words that accurately convey the level of disgust I have for those shoes. Those shoes are what happens when crocs and toe socks drink a bottle of vodka and then do something regrettable together. They are unnatural and should be eradicated from the Earth. I should not have to look at them while I work out and my mind will not be changed about this no matter what you say.

And speaking of the gym, are there rules regarding using cardio equipment too close to another gym goer? Today I was on a treadmill and there were at least ten other treadmills open to my left, yet a woman got on the one right next to me. Too close! Personal space! I don't want to be sprayed by your sweat! There need to be rules about this. I think we could apply men's urinal rules to these types of situations and everyone would be happier.

Has anything been pissing you off that you would like to share with the class?

Thursday, October 22, 2009

tweed is good

Recently a pregnant friend emailed me a list of name suggestions because Truman was included on the list. And while finding his name on a baby name list is nothing special, finding it on a list of yupster baby names is. After reading the description of a yupster, a blend of yuppies and hipsters, I had to laugh because despite what I think I am, a yupster pretty much sums up jparks and I.

And since I want Truman to feel like he belongs in this family, I did this to him:

Future Accountant, originally uploaded by whitneybee.

Don't lie, right now you're dying from the cuteness.

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Things that prove my brain is broken

  • I was searching for a part for my coffeepot yesterday morning and couldn't find it. After a minute I realized the part was in my hand

  • Searched for a netflix movie longer than was necessary because I swore I saw it on the coffee table. Couldn't locate it. Found it in that day's mail as it had just arrived. Who knows what I saw on the coffee table. Possibly a ghost movie. Someone call TAPS

  • Returned a netflix movie without the inner sleeve. Which I had in my hand while I packed up the disc. Let's hope they can sort out that I'm returning disc 3 of Mad Men Season 2 and not some other customer.

  • Twice packed up bottles so I wouldn't have to suffer through breastfeeding in public and twice, TWICE, forgot the bottle on the kitchen counter. And of course each time the damn kid got hungry and forced me to feed him. Call me a prude, but I hate breastfeeding in public.

  • Worked on another blog post for the past three days whenever I could steal a minute of time for the computer and then, on the fourth day, totally forgot the point of the post and decided to delete it. I should have just ended it by rambling on aimlessly but I didn't. You are so welcome.

  • Totally forgot that the dining group I am part of was supposed to meet tonight. At least everyone else in the group forgot as well. I have a valid excuse for forgetting, what's your excuse slackers?!? Too busy with your jobs and child free lives? (kidding, totally kidding. Please don't kick me out of the group. I like food.)

  • Bought 8 six packs of beer, 2 bottles of red wine, 2 bottles of white, 2 bottle of sparkling rose, and 4 22oz bottle of beer because I haven't had alcohol in a really long time. Well, since weekend before last. But prior to that it was forever ago. Man, I forgot how much I like beer. And wine. And sparkling beverages. mmmm, booze.