Wednesday, June 4, 2014

forward momentum

Lately I've been feeling unlike myself. I sit at the keyboard and it doesn't feel right. I pick up my camera and have to think about what to do with it instead of just doing. I prep for a run, step off, and stumble. Place a barbell on my back and I struggle to move it. You get the picture. 

I'm not sure what it is. I would say the keyboard/camera thing is from lack of using those muscles but I know that's not the case with the running/lifting heavy shit. To steal a line from Robert Frost "The best way out is always through" so I'm forcing myself to work through the discomfort. 

Today that meant not quitting the workout even when my coach asked if I needed to stop. (I can only imagine how bad I looked for her to ask that because quitting is usually not an option. Failing, yes. Quitting, no.) It means sitting down and droning on here with no point or plan or anything. (lucky you!) Just reacquainting my fingers with the keyboard. Making my brain flex its vocabulary muscle a bit.  It means dragging my camera bag out and taking my camera with me again. And learning to not feel like a tourist whenever I use it. I'm also trying to teach myself how to use Lightroom which is not going well at all. I am suddenly remembering that I am not the best teacher for myself. I would say I'm going to go run and not concern myself with stumbling but frankly my legs are done for today after this morning's lifting session.

So there you have it, I'm unlike myself lately and I can't pinpoint why. I'm trying to improve the situation but who knows how long that will take. I bought a bathing suit and plan to wear it with no shame this summer. (That is obviously unrelated to anything but important.)

Don't worry guys, the cat is as skeptical as you are. Stop scowling Tangi, I can do it! I can figure out Lightroom and run again! 
Now, does anyone have any suggestions for Lightroom tutorials? I've got work to do. 


  1. I go through cycles like that, where nothing feels right, and I can't get motivated or inspired by anything. Wish I knew where they come from or how to snap out. They just seem to cycle away. On Lightroom. I am utterly no help. I bought Photoshop a few years ago, even took a class, and have zero time to actually USE what I kind of learned. But because I am dumb, I've considered getting Lightroom because it might be easier. Ha ha haaa. I wish you perserverance & time on Lightroom! Maybe a local camera shop has a class? That's what I did for Photoshop.

  2. Mercury is in retrograde or the moon is out of whack because I could have written this post. I feel exactly the same lately and I can't seem to shake it.

    Funny enough, I was thinking about posting on my dust-covered blog tonight for just this reason. Thinking it would kickstart SOMETHING.

  3. I am so in this cycle right now. Haven't picked up a camera, hardly updating my blog, hardly doing anything, really. If I start to stumble my way out of it, I'll let you know what worked...

    Maybe try for a Lightroom class? I think you can pay for individual classes, and they're all online, and usually broken into short segments so you don't have to sit there for 2 hours, you can do sections at a time.

  4. 1. It's because you're not on the Fitbit list, life's sole source of motivation, anymore. 2. I'm happy that we are both celebrating Reference Robert Frost On Your Blog Week, yay!

  5. I read, blah blah, blah then saw Tangi! The best assistant cat camp director that ever was. Now back to reading what you wrote. ;)

  6. I read, blah blah, blah then saw Tangi! The best assistant cat camp director that ever was. Now back to reading what you wrote. ;)

  7. I was feeling like that about running so I rode my bike instead and it was better. For the blogs and photos... cute babies help for the photos, for the blogging I have no idea, I am so far behind on my love letters....