Thursday, November 5, 2015


*knock knock knock*

Person peeks through peephole

"Have you seen proof of majesty in the world? No? Would you allow me to introduce you to capes? I think they'll make a big difference in your life!" 

But seriously guys. Capes. They are where it's at for the fall. I love them and want to buy every one I see, turning myself from slightly crazy lady to full blown nutjob who possibly thinks she's a superhero.

Trina Turk and apparently sold out every where, which I know because I tried to order it from four places and each one cancelled my order. THAT HURTS GUYS.

The knock off of the Trina cape dress but look at the hidden pink! You could do sweeping arm motions to flash it.  
I hate navy yet I would still knock down a small child to get to this cape. It also comes in "pale grey" which looks more like oatmeal to me but who cares, it's a cape!
Boden added fur to this one and good lord, that funnel neck would make me gag every time I wore it but I would somehow persist. (gag me because I can't wear turtlenecked things without dry heaving my way through the day)
Please can I have $865? Please?
Now you can cosplay as Little Red Riding Hood for less than $40.
In closing, can I have $865? Please?

Tuesday, April 14, 2015

pictures are coming

I assume it's common knowledge that jparks is an internet celebrity, right? If not, the short version is he's a Big Deal in an online video game called Eve, where he considers himself a badass spaceship pilot and I consider him lucky to be married. Every year for the last 5, he's traveled to Iceland for FanFest, a giant three day celebration of these badass spaceship pilots and the video game they love. 

At FanFest there's lots of this:
I tried the VR once but did it while he was also playing so there's no photographic evidence
and this:
Daily keynotes in an 1800 person concert hall filled with badass space pilots and their wives/girlfriends who have are desperately trying to not fall asleep

and some of this:
Booze because vacation
As my tolerance for sitting in keynotes, panels, and other assorted video game discussions is short I made sure to see and do plenty of tourist stuff as well. Cultural things like the penis museum and grocery shopping:
Those would be replicas of the Icelandic handball team's penises
So cultural! (get it, because it's yogurt. FYI: I'm cackling over this)
But really, the best thing I did in Iceland was having Viking portraits taken by a guy who works on Game of Thrones when they film there. I was skeptical, especially since my previous experience with a photo session of the not-family variety was a slightly traumatic one, but still I ventured on. Turns out I got super fucking lucky and something that could have gone horribly wrong went really, really well.
Fact: Vikings totally wore false eyelashes. 
Fact: Vikings swords are heavy, especially when held awkwardly
Fact: It's a good idea to drag a friend to do pictures with you especially if you barely know the person and things could potentially go horribly wrong
I made friends with one of the other badass spaceship pilot's girlfriends and somehow convince this very shy and reserved girl to come with me to take these pictures. I'm not going to lie, she managed to get the best picture from the bunch and I'm 100% jealous of it. 
Fact: She looks like a total loon and its the best thing ever 
To be honest, Iceland was never high on my list of places to visit. It's cold, small, and they eat shark that tastes like it's soaked in urine; those things are not exactly appealing. But after a week there I'm willing to admit that it's pretty amazing. Good job winning me over Bjorkland. 

It took me so long to write this post because my fingers frozen when visiting this frozen lake and just defrosted.