Know what sucks? Not being able to check luggage when you fly. See, I’m going to LA tomorrow for two days and I’m flying with my boss. He has forbidden me from checking luggage which isn’t a huge deal for a two day trip. Unless you’re me and you need lots of liquids. Liquids like shampoo, toothpaste, deodorant, face lotion, hair product, mascara, lip gloss, should I keep going or do you the idea? And I only get to bring 3 ounce bottles of stuff and one zip top bag.

This is why I don’t vacation for just a couple of days. When you go for more than three days you’re expected to check luggage. You’re expected to bring toothpaste. And a full sized deodorant. Glorious, glorious full sized things. When we went to Maui I brought 40 bottles of sunscreen. Just. Because. I Could.

The other issue with not checking luggage is that it takes up one of the two vital carry on spots you get. So tomorrow the camera will have to go into the luggage. As well as my laptop. And my in flight entertainment will have to be carried in my purse. So it can’t be anything bigger than a book. This is not going to end well. I need lots of stuff to make me forget that I’m in the air. I need lots of stuff to keep my mind off of the fact that I might puke right into the lap of the stranger sitting next to me.

Oy, at least there will be drinks poolside when I land.

Okay, in truth it’s only some of the shoes.

This weekend I had the brilliant idea of lining all my shoes up on the steps and taking a picture. But the fatal flaw was that I have more shoes than steps (even if I put three pairs per step). Plus you couldn’t really see the shoes at the top of the steps.

After some carefully scouting places in the house I decided I should lay them all out in the living room. But they wouldn’t all fit. I was going to break them into two pictures, flats and heels, but I ran out of time before I got to the heels.

So stay tuned, heels coming soon. And, if I can figure out how to move the coffee table, maybe you’ll get a shot of all the pairs together.

If you click the picture, it’ll take you to flickr where you can see all the notes I added.

There is a meme going around the interwebs right now that has you realize how you are wasting your life at your current job by pointing out all the careers you would be really good at and that you would actually enjoy. It’s like a trip to your high school guidance counselor but 10 years too late.

I finally broke down after seeing the lovely Ms. Chez Shoes take the quiz and get slotted for many things including: dog groomer, sign maker, and butcher. Wow, such diversity! I had to find out what I’m meant to do career wise. Maybe I was supposed to be a sign maker too. I’ve always loved the smell of tempera paint. And glitter is so much fun.

After completing the quiz my results popped up and they really weren’t all that diverse:

1. Elementary School Teacher
2. High School Teacher
3. Teacher Assistant
4. Early Childhood Educator
5. Professor
6. Nanny
7. Communications Specialist
8. Print Journalist
9. Critic
10. Market Research Analyst
11. Writer
12. Translator
13. Activist
14. Public Relations Specialist
15. Political Aide
16. Public Policy Analyst
17. Special Education Teacher
18. Physical Education Teacher
19. Adoption Counselor
20. Career Counselor
21. Music Teacher / Instructor
22. Lifeguard
23. Foreign Language Instructor
24. ESL Teacher
25. Correctional Officer
26. Actor

How many times can “You shouldn’t have switched out of the education department in college, you moron” be stated in one list? Apparently, a lot.

I understand that I probably should have been a teacher but really the most fitting suggestions on the list are lifeguard and actor. Because when people meet me they always ask if I ever auditioned for Baywatch. I just look like I should be wearing a red bikini, holding a flotation device, and running down the beach in slow-mo. awww yeah.

Big thank yous to everyone that has donated thus far. The great news is that I’m close to my goal. The not so great news is that while I’m close, but not there yet. I still need to raise $40 to reach my goal but the SF Komen Race Center is still 40% away from its overall goal. Now I know that I can’t personally raise $241,134 but I know we can do our part and meet my goal. Maybe we can even raise a bit more than that $500.

And if you’re on the fence about donating let me say that the Race is going to be torture for me. It’s been cold the past couple of mornings and running has made me feel like my lungs are filled with ice. And the race is happening a bit north of here which means it’ll be even colder. So for your donation you get to be in your warm bed having warm dreams and I get to be out running in the cold trying to not keel over from frost bite. Okay maybe not frost bite, but I’ll definitely have cold hands. And a runny nose. A runny nose people! That’s just torture.

Clicky click.

Have you been on the edge of your seat wondering how our painter debacle ended? I am happy to report that on Monday he showed up exactly on time (maybe he reads my blog. Hello Mr. Painter Man!) and finished our living room and half bathroom by noon (I think. I wasn’t home and jparks didn’t tell me exactly what time the guy finished). I’m thinking he only did one coat in the bath and it really needs another coat or at least some spots need to be touched up. But I know jparks was getting antsy because he really needed to get to work so there was no time for second coats.

By the end of the day jparks was all “We are never hiring another painter. Never!” But the truth is that I will hire another painter to finish up the house. There is no way I’m going to have the time or energy to do it myself and some of it will just end up a big mess if I try. The problem (again) is that someone needs to be home while the painter is there. And as I mentioned, it’s really hard for either jparks or I to work from home.

So today I was toying with ways to get the job finished without either of us having to be home. Maybe I could hire a house sitter to sit in the house while the painter is there. Or hire a cleaning crew to come while the painter is working. Then pay the painter a bit extra to watch the cleaning crew and pay the cleaning crew a bit extra to watch the painter. Or maybe I could buy a nanny cam and set it up in the room that the painter is working in. Or maybe I could get a camcorder and strap it to Lily’s back. Then I could have her sit and video the painter all day.

Really, how can I pick just one of these ideas when they are all so good?

Come on people, we’ve got 12 days until the Race and I still need to raise $190 to meet my goal. Let’s all click and give for a good cause.

Hooray for boobies!

People keep asking to see pictures of our new house and I keep saying soon! Really soon! But not right now! See, I’m a bit OCD (surprise!) and I want my house to be finished before I start showing it off. Hence the housewarming not happening until October. Of 2012.

First on my list of things to do was get the living room painted. We decided to go with painters for the job because there are stairs involved. Stairs and really high spots. And I’m short. And you might not know it from my hobbies but I’m afraid of heights. And I’m afraid of being on a ladder during an earthquake. Is there a name for that particular phobia?

After having a couple of painters give us bids I decided not to hire the cheapest guy, but to hire the guy that could come the earliest and said he could get the job done in one day because he has an assistant. That was great news because jparks and I can’t really hang out at the house instead of going to work for more than one day. We are both way too important for that.

On Wednesday the painter showed up. Without his assistant. “Hey, this might take two days since I don’t have my assistant. But he should be here tomorrow and we should be able to get it done.” okay, fine. jparks will try to work from home that morning and I’ll take the afternoon off. Except, later the same day, he announces “You know, if my assistant can’t make it tomorrow I might have to finish up on Monday.” Do you see where this is going, because I didn’t. I was all “Of course his assistant will show up! People are nice and good and always do as they promise. Look a rainbow!” I’m such a twit. Or knitting wit, as my mom likes to say.

On Thursday he came back sans assistant. That is also the day my head exploded. I think the two things are related but who knows for sure. He painted enough to say “look I painted!” but not enough that we are able to put our living room back together. Because being able to sit on your couch is a luxury jparks and I just don’t need right now. Today we had a coffee table delivered. I have no freaking idea where it’s going to go, but that’s part of the fun. Our living room is a giant Tetris game and I can’t wait to get home and play.

On Monday the painter is coming back to hopefully finish everything. He says that for going over the estimated time frame he’s going to touch up some of our scuffed walls for free. I’m thinking that should only take an extra 4 days. 5, if his assistant doesn’t show up.

I’m definitely feeling like a home owner as jparks and I spent a large chunk of our long weekend working on various home projects. I painted and he elfa-tized our bedroom closet.

In order to add the new shelving he had to remove all of my shoes from the closet. He stacked the ones in boxes in another closet and dumped all of the ones not in boxes into a big pile. Normally I would have yelled at him for this, but I was too busy to care. I was also too busy to count my shoes and take a nice picture of them. Instead I present you with this:

I’m not certain how many pairs of shoes are in this pile and tower configuration, but I do know that this is not all of the shoes in the house. I swear, I’m going to count them this week. Scout’s honor!