For the last three nights of this trip we’ve been staying in the fanciest hotel that I have ever seen, much less stayed in, Dromoland Castle. It’s a total first class kind of place and I think we’ve been on the verge of eviction multiple times. On our first night here jparks and I were walking around with some friends from the tour when the boys apparently lost their minds and started acting like fools.

Here’s jparks sporting wood:

And look, here they are molesting really old artwork:

And lost in the bushes in the front of the hotel. (You can’t really tell, but the bushes are cut into a fancy design)

When we went back inside the lobby people were giving us some really dirty looks. Imagine Emily Gilmore but make her a bit more uptight and you have the kind of folks we were getting looks from. Not that I entirely blame them, but we weren’t being loud, causing damage, or pestering them in any way, we were simply acting like 12 year olds. And really, every once in awhile, I think that’s okay.

Last month two friends of ours eloped and last night was the wedding reception. So there we were at this lovely wedding reception and what do I do? I get totally drunk. Like three sheets to the wind, not sure how I even remained upright, possibly drank more than one bottle of wine by myself drunk. It was not pretty.

I’m not even sure how I got that drunk. I planned on having a few drinks and expected to get a little tipsy, but I seriously didn’t plan on passing out in my makeup when we got home. I woke up this morning with black eyeliner smudged under my eyes. It was not pretty, although it did kinda have that sexy look that I can’t achieve when I’m doing my own makeup.

Most of the people at the reception are not folks we see on a regular basis and when we do see them I’m not normally drinking. I’m now trying to run through the bits of the night that I can remember and see if I said or did anything asinine. God, I want to die just thinking about it. I’m pretty sure I told various folks that I was hot. And then I might have touched a finger to my bum and made a sizzling noise. Booze + 4.5 inch heels + a little black dress + some makeup = Regan feeling all sexy and mouthing off about it to every person that commented on her shoes. (not to linger on an off topic, but those shoes are bad ass. When the salesgirl asked me if I liked them I told her I wanted to go make out with them. When jparks and I got out of the car at the wedding he said “Baby, you look really slutty tonight!” “Uh, thanks honey.” “No it’s a compliment, I LOVE SLUTS.”)

I am just horrified. Did I mention that I’m horrified? I AM HORRIFIED. Sizzling noise! What person actually does that to themselves? Paris Hilton maybe, but not me.

And folks, if I thought I felt like death after that one beer earlier this week, then you can only imagine how crappy I felt this morning. And I didn’t even get to sleep in, I had to get up and go work a Giants game. Thankfully there were fried foods in the suite. Nothing makes a hangover better faster than fried foods. Unless it’s fried foods and a fountain diet coke.

No more booze. No more not paying attention to the number of refills I’ve had. No more skipping a glass of water between drinks. No more making an ass of myself in front of people that might not be expecting that from me. No more touching my own bum and making a sizzling noise. The next time I wear those shoes I can’t let their power go to my head.

me: “I have another f’ing nail in my tire. How is that possible?!?”

whitneybee: “Is someone following you around dropping nails?” (I think that’s what she said, I might have accidentally deleted that message)

“I guess I get them when I’m trolling for hot man ass at construction sites.”

“You’ll have to start trolling for hot man ass somewhere else, preferably a place with less sharp objects on the ground.”

“So the broken glass factory is out. Dang, lots of hot man ass there.”

“I know. We’ve really cut down on spots for trolling. Maybe you need to find a different form of transportation for trolling for hot man ass.”

“Bareback unicorn for trolling?”

“I think that would definitely draw attention to you. It’s a bit more interesting than a Segway at least.”

Anyone know where I can rent a unicorn?

Is there anyone out there that thought I was still young, cool, and hip? Yeah? Heh, let me provide just how silly of a thought that is.

Last night, on New Year’s Eve, the biggest party night of the year, jparks and I hung out with some good friends and welcomed the new year by watching Star Trek: Deep Space Nine and playing Guitar Hero. And I totally enjoyed every minute of it. Sometimes staying in and doing dorky things while consuming champagne is more fun that being out at a crowded bar. Plus, bars don’t like it if you light RoboDog at midnight. And it’s not a party without RoboDog.

Happy 2008 ya’ll. May you stick to your resolutions for longer than I stick to mine.

On Friday night I’m going to Lauren’s work’s holiday party as her date. And do you know what dates get? Dates get corsages! I think if I keep pushing enough she’ll give in. I mean how could you not want to see me wearing this on my wrist: clicky here. Seriously, isn’t it the most amazing, festive, breath-taking thing you’ve ever seen? I would be the belle of the ball wearing it.

The party is a casino night/karaoke/Dance Party USA thing and I am so totally excited for it. I’ve never been to real office casino night party. And I’ve only been to karaoke things in the Quarter when everyone is so drunk that you have to watch the video the next day to see that you were really there. This party has the potential to fulfill all of my dreams of what a true work holiday party can be.

But only if I get the damn corsage.

Chris Sanders (who sucks! LOSER!): “So are you two gonna get Guitar Hero for Wii? ’cause we are. And we’re gonna kick y’alls ass.”

me: “THEMS FIGHTING WORDS!”

Loser: “indeed”

me: “Dang it, jparks sucks at Guitar Hero. Can I sub in a player?”

Loser: “only if they’re an existing member of the household with opposable thumbs.”

me: “I’ll have to get him playing more often. Because we aren’t losers.”

Loser: “yet”

Can I just tell you guys that never before have I not wanted jparks on my team, but right now I would throw him under the freaking train for Lauren. Hey Lauren, you wanna move in?

I told you it was an awesome picture.

Happy Easter all!

Last year jparks and I started our favorite holiday tradition: Undead Easter. We sit around, eat candy, drink, and watch zombie movies. This year we expanded on this by inviting way more people than will fit in our apartment over for Undead Easter. I cooked, made a huge Easter basket, and watched as even more food rolled in.

We ran a bit short on zombie movies as I was more concerned with cooking and jparks had said he was going to handle getting more movies, but then forgot. We supplemented the zombie movies with Ricky Bobby and everyone seemed okay with this.

I’m happy to say that I’m sitting here with a pissed off stomach after eating nothing but cheese and candy all day, but am still quite content. I honestly like nothing more than having a bunch of friends over. I don’t mind all the cooking, cleaning, and general hostess duties involved with it. Being surrounded by friends makes our year anniversary in this overpriced area, that’s bound to fall into the ocean, a little bit easier to accept.

I have a confession: I am horrible with names. Beyond horrible actually. If you tell me your name, I will forget it in less than 10 seconds. That’s a guarantee, forgotten in 10 seconds or less or your money back.

This has never been much of a problem until recently. Since starting my new job I’ve met tons of people and, since my job is client services, I really should be remembering all of their names. But I can’t. I shake their hands and politely introduce myself to them and then Wham! forget their name as soon as they say it. It’s even worse when I’m on the phone with a person. They introduce them self and my ears blank out their name. “Hi this is cricket sounds and I’m calling…”

You would think in my private life I might make more of an effort to remember people’s names, but I don’t. Since joining Trapeze Arts I’ve met a bunch of people and can’t tell you one of their names. The sad part is that now I’ve seen them enough times that I can’t ask their names, that would be rude and weird. So I’m stuck waiting for someone else to call our their name so I can make a mental note of it.

Seems tiring doesn’t it? It really is. I spend a lot of time eavesdropping on conversations in the hopes that I’ll learn a name or two. I don’t know why I have this block against learning names and even when I have the best intentions to remember them, it seems I can’t.

On the other hand, I really am a nosy person and I love having a half way decent reason to eavesdrop. Maybe I unconsciously don’t learn people’s names so I can continue to do this guilt free. dear god, that’s sick and I might want to get some help.

…a gift was given to the world. A child was born to the delight of many.

Happy Birthday to me!

So far I’m liking 27. Why? Because I’ve gotten some pretty awesome gifts. Check them out:

My mother-in-law sent me this a sewing machine, which totally surprised me. I haven’t been able to play with it yet, thanks to jparks telling me not to go buy any fabric or patterns and because I’m behind on my crochet homework. (I’m only capable of one craft at a time)


Looky, I can make all kinds of neat stitches!

My bosses gave me the suite at the HP Pavilion for tonight. Why? Because Justin Timberlake is playing there! Holy crap, I’m going with 11 of my friends (or friends of friends) to watch JT shake what God gave him on stage. I’m pretty sure I’ll be foaming at the mouth later.

My mom gave me a bracelet that I’m having a hella hard time photographing, so I’ll just link to it instead.

Jparks also gave me a bracelet, but I’m thinking of returning it and getting an external camera flash instead. He’s also taking me out to dinner somewhere nice. I’m not sure that he knows he taking me out to dinner, but I assure you, it’ll happen.

AND, (this birthday list just keeps going on and on) some friends of mine are having a little dinner party for me on Saturday. Yay! Food, cake, and wine (maybe even champagne), I can’t wait!